He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
There r osticjed everywhere
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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