I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Randomize
