so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
