He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
