why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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