is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
no you cant smoke seaweed
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
