i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
