How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
