some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
