I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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