Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
