could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i think i have two assholes
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
