The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
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