it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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