Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
