You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
