Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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