And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
