i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
