Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
