so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
