Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize
