3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
