It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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