So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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