whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
