You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
