and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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