I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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