dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
