Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
