OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
