They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I need to sanitize my soul.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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