i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
