Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
