It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize