You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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