The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
