i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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