Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
