Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
