the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
