If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
