so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
