1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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