If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
