we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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