so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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