Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
