I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
